My life feels just as uncertain sometimes these days. I know I have two hands to help people. I know I’m trying to act wisely to serve people. But I can’t predict how the lives of these people that I talk to each day will change. I have great, tested faith that my writing produces change a world away a year at a time. But even that requires a good measure of faith in God that good will result from our most diligent efforts.

It reminds me of friends I wrote about today. In the southern reaches of their country, they currently are far from the war and fighting that tore their lives apart for decades. But in 3 short years, they know that the fighting will very likely return. The temporary peace will shatter. When? How? Few are certain.

What wisdom does a man in that community have to share with me at this time in life? What insight does a life full of few certainties but dread have for me? Some days I wish I could ask. Till then, God provides and I receive the crumbs from a master’s table that sustain a life full of blessing.

But tonight as thoughts swirl, I reflect on the beauty of the “almost.”

In the almost, we see what could be.
In the almost, we see something greater than here.
In the almost, we see the seeds of something that could change everything.

And I tend to think that many folks need that “almost” almost as much as they need the dreamed of thing to happen. They need that belief that something greater is to come and be energized to act in a way that accentuates the beauty of what is to come.

It could be why we so often show pictures of the runner breaking the tape, of football players making the catch and olympians straining to win. For a moment, we join with them in their passion and desire. For a moment, we are longing for something together. The gold medal, the award, the trophy… they’ll come soon enough. For now, we are hoping for the almost that is just out of reach… and it’s amazing.

So when I stumbled across babbel [via] (a web language learning program) today, I was already thinking about the multitude of languages out there. “Oh, they teach Spanish, French, Italian… but wait… what kind of Spanish do they teach?”

Certainly there is a growing recognition that major languages (including English) have very different expressions in different countries. You can search for “learn Latin American Spanish” and hit a few resources. But search for “learn Guatamalan Spanish” and the results are pretty sparse save for opportunities in Guatamala.

It’s not a matter of right and wrong, but I look forward to an ever-growing recognition that we live in a complex world with many beautiful languages and styles of speaking those languages–all of great value.

29 years ago
I began the life of a pastor’s son in a church community I still love
God was kind

25 years ago
I slept on a rug in Mrs. Landau’s class
God was kind

20-some years ago
I realized how much I loved writing in English class
God was kind

12 years ago
I served people on the streets of Chicago
God was kind

8 years ago
I walked across the stage, name in hat
God was kind

7 years ago
I showed up with two bags in California to help people translate the Bible
God was kind

6 years ago
I met amazing friends who I welcomed newcomers with
God was kind

4 or so years ago
I traveled the desert with my mother, a Camry, a roof-top carrier and tires that didn’t make it
God was kind

3 or so years go
I found another part of my family through a pastel website
God was kind

1 or so years ago
I learned the encouragement of serving those in need
God was kind

1 or so years ago
Some folks thought I should be given the gift of ordination
God was kind

Today, this journey may end. Each day I’ve lived I’ve tried to remember it may be my last. But God is kind and has provided what I’ve needed this far. And till that time when life is over I pray I’ll have a bit more energy to help a few more people.

I’ve spent many days in the past few years trying to help friends in need. Some are clearly in physical or emotional need. Some have needs that are hidden a bit deeper. Sometimes my efforts are well-appreciated. Sometimes outsiders seem quick to judge what they perceive as my lack of truly caring.

My friend is a special case. I’ve walked a long ways with him and he’s taught me things even in the midst of his struggles. Many nights I want to skip all the red tape and let my friend crash on the futon in my living room. A softer bed, a bit more freedom and a stress-free environment–these golden things I so often take for granted–they are denied him regularly. And when it’s all written out on paper, it’s clear I can’t change that right now.

But every weekend we sit facing each other, pouring over classifieds, worries, want ads and questions about God. And on those days I try to do the impossible, praying all the while. At each corner, we face the problems together and it seems we barely keep pace.

This past week I sat with another friend and I realized just how hard this has been personally. It’s like seeing my brother in pain and being unable to end it. It’s a regular, emotional struggle that I keep giving to God in prayer.

Some days that encourages me.

Some days I’m desperate for it to end for both of us.

But with the advent of modern information technology and infrastructure, I see that changing every day. Whether you go to the store, your favorite social networking site or your favorite TV program, there is a presentation of the world’s needs everywhere today.The question for even the average person is no longer, “Is there need?” Now, everyone is asking, “How many more am I able to help?”

Are we preparing our children, our young men and women and the people we influence for this new reality? It’s not enough anymore to teach someone to manage their own things. We need to teach them how to make the most of their ability to help other people in an increasingly connected world.

In coming days, good friends will stand in front of a crowd and make a commitment to each other. It’s been a journey I’m sure. Good things never come easy and the best rarely come without difficulty. But from what I know of my friends, they’ve done everything they can to honor God and each other along the way. They’ve talked through what it means to commit for life and agreed to step into the unknown–together.

I was back home to celebrate my parents’ anniversary in a small, belated way this past week. We returned to the amusement park where they had their first date and rode the ride that tossed the contents of my mom’s purse everywhere. Stealing a moment, they kissed and we took pictures. It was a private time between them and two of their children–all alone in the crowd but together.

Sharing a thermos, we unfolded the red checkered blanket, unpacked the plates and cups and sat on the ground. Tea isn’t really my thing but everything was good and it was clear that the food was just an excuse to spend time.

Sometimes you need to have times like this. A little shared food, plenty of time and no agenda. I don’t know if J will remember our time together years from now. She’s only a couple years old and likes to wrestle as much as share invisible tea. But I’ve been told there is a Turkish proverb that if you share coffee together you are committing to 40 years of friendship. If that applies
to tea, I think I’ve got a friend for life.

It happened again today. I was leaving the shop and got the distinct impression that a new friend could use some of my time. Label it what you want, something, perhaps even God, gave me the distinct impression I needed to go back as I crossed the intersection.

One u-turn, awkward introduction and prayer together later I was sitting with a guy I don’t think I’ve ever met before. We talked about life, about challenges and about hope. I left him with my number and the knowledge that people… that God cared about him and his family.

If I’m going to really help reconcile with each other and see hope for life, I need to sit on more sidewalks. I need to sit in little Mexican restaurants. I need to wander the back alleys of whatever town I’m in.

For the next while I’ll be posting here and copying many posts over to Myspace where my relatives hang out.

I’ll still be around now and again, but won’t likely post much more here. Thanks for caring enough to read what I’ve written.